...and that's all I'm gonna say about that

Pimping Myself

If you have the chance, click FastWeb on my sidebar and sign up. It is free and everytime someone signs up using that link I am entered in a lottery for a $2500 scholarship.

If'n you wanna you can also click HERE and vote for my slipper picture. I could win $500 for school there also.

front garden bed, check!

Tagged!

Okay, so truthfully, I have already done this one a while back. While telling Gina that I had been tagged by Grumpy Granny, I said, "I don't know if I can find more quirky things about myself." Gina paused and then said, "You're kidding right?".

Well, okey dokey then...

1. I love amusement park rides! But I am petrified of the Ferris Wheel.

2. I have a life long desire to bike up the coast from the border of Mexico to the border of Canada. Tenting it all the way with a journal and a camera.

3. One day I will own another convertible. And I am considering painting it to match my lawn mower.

4. I cannot and will not ever, never eat pumpkin. Period.

5. I hate having fingernails and cut them down so far that it looks as if I bite them.

6. I have a suspicion that I was Amy Lowell in another lifetime or a family friend because I can feel, see and smell her library at Sevenells. I have a clear memory of sitting with the afternoon sun spilling through the window and across the floor.

7. I am a synesthete. (look it up or see my blog entry)

8. I have sex in my sleep. I am sure Gina will elaborate on this eventually.

9. My given name is not Nina. My old friends still call me the name they are used to and I wouldn't like it if they called me anything else. My new friends call me Nina. And if you are with me and I meet someone new (usually straight men) I still introduce myself as Michelle. It's a defensive move I make to keep people I don't want to really know me at a comfortable distance.

10. I don't do panties. Exception is if I am wearing a dress. TMI?

Pride

It’s almost June,
the season of pride and appreciation.
Where the light shines late into the hour
illuminating even the darkest corners
of overgrown and untended gardens.

She has woken, lifting her voice above a whisper,
silence no longer her companion.
She will walk barefoot and dance to
the music which plays inside her;
it beckons her to follow, to reach out
and hold her beloved in the sunshine.

nina

It's a far different poem than when I wrote it in May of 2006.

I have just purchased my tickets to fly to Gina for Pride weekend in Denver!

Read about Denver Pride 2008

Rebecca Scott

we have history... too bad she doesn't know about it. Well, i think she knows a little bit about it, she has watched me from the stage as I have danced the dance of joy during my coming out over the last 2 years, however, she lacks the details. Her music will always fill me with the intense rush of identity, memories of hot summer nights in downtown Boise, of the taste of whiskey and coke in a darkened bar, of life.

Ready! and....

Cheerleading camp!

My 9 year old has attended several times but my 6 year old was never old enough to go. This year her "someday" came. She was the epitome of perky. It was held at the high school from 9am to 5pm today. All of the MVH cheerleaders were in charge of what looked like a hundred thousand children and preteens. I think it's part of the school's abstinence program, or at least it should be. I am sure at least 3/4's of those girls went home and told their mothers that they would never, ever have children.

Speaking of children... here are mine!

Unexpected Art

and now if you're feelin' good n' groovy, here is a song to mow by:

"we bury dead guys"

i mentioned a few posts back that i am writing a business plan for a green cemetery. i am having a very hard time not turning this 15 page monstrosity into a comedy skit.

really though what *am* i supposed to say when describing my target market? "ummm, people with no sinus rhythm?" what about my plan to attract business? it's a fine line (felony?) between finding customers and creating customers isn't it? what about my plan to sustain business? isn't it a given that people will keep dying?

my professor keeps emphasizing the importance of this project and the seriousness and due respect it should be given. He just doesn't get me. i am having fun no matter what he wants. i will eventually give him serious numbers and the solemnity he requires but geez, i never pass up a chance to go for the joke.



Oh, lay me down in Forest Lawn in a silver casket
with golden flowers over my head in a silver basket.
Let the drum and bugle corp play taps while cannons roar.
While sixteen liveried employees sell souvenirs from the funeral store.
I wanna go simply when I go. They'll give me a simple funeral there, I know.
With a casket lined in fleece and the fireworks spelling out "Rest in Peace,"
Oh, take me when I'm gone to Forest Lawn.

Oh, lay me down in Forest Lawn, they understand there.
They have a heavenly choir in the military band there.
Just put me in their care, I'll find my comfort there.
With sixteen planes in a last salute, they'll drop a cross in a parachute.
I wanna go simply when I go, they'll give me a simple funeral there I know
With a hundred strolling strings and topless dancers with golden wings,
Oh, take me when I'm gone to Forest Lawn.

Oh, come, come, come, come, come to the church in the wild wood,
Kindly leave a contribution in the pail.
Be as simple and as trusting as a child would and we'll sell you the church in the dale.

To find a simple resting place is my desire.
To lay me down with a smiling face comes a little bit higher.
My likeness cast in brass will stand in plastic grass
While hidden weights and springs tips it's hat to the mourners filing past.

I wanna go simply when I go. They'll give me a simple funeral there I know.
I'll lie beneath the sand with piped-in tapes of Billy Graham,
oh, take me when I'm gone to forest lawn.

Rock of ages cleft for me for a slightly higher fee. Oh, take me when I'm gone to forest lawn.

The Jig is Up!

Apparently, according to my professor, i cannot write an illustration or descriptive paragraph to save my life. i agree that when i am told to write about a preselected topic i go blank and all my personality drains out of my body. My muse refuses to go to school with me at night. She sits here waiting for me to come home. i am not sure what she is doing while i am away. i have found empty beer cans and Cheetos under my bed though.

i realize my writing is not high caliber nor is it grammatically correct. i also engage in creative spelling and CapItaliZation. Gina's favorite creatively spelled word is: lushous. Although i *did* change it once i saw it. Unfortunately Gina is too quick for second publications.

i think what bugs me most is that e.e. cummings got away with almost all these things listed above and yet he became famous for his style and content. it's damn frustrating! in fact, it is so frustrating that i am going to go on a capitalization strike. from now on i am a lowercase lesbian. i will stay this way until my professor sees that i am indeed a rare talent or i recover (gracefully?) from my temper tantrum!

Neena Goes Greena

I am now the proud owner and the birds the beneficiaries of my first solar panel! I realize this won't save the polar bears however it will keep us from draining more from the power grid. It will also save us from the ugly extention cord hell which can easily get out of hand when you start junkin' up the yard with moving gnomes and windmills.

Nina~ Saving the world one bird bath at a time.

The Weekend in Pictures

My son had his senior prom this weekend. He had his beautiful girlfriend by his side and the knowledge that he will after all be graduating this year. He pulled his grades up to stellar straight D's. We are so proud. Inspite of my obvious frustration with him, I must confess that when I saw him in tails I couldn't help but be proud albeit a bit melancholy. Regardless of how hard he has tried to not grow up, he has. At least physically.



























The big black "X"'s on their hands stands for Straight Edge. It's a movement to live drug free. He is anti-anti culture. I don't have the heart to tell him that he is holding many Conservative views. He prides himself in his Liberalism. Perhaps he will open up an avenue for his mother to be a political force for I am likewise inclined. I have to give him credit. He has lived this way passionately for years and shows no sign of stopping. Now if he will only get a job and move out... heh.

Gina and I took the kids to the zoo on saturday. Her first Mother's Day with the girls. She had the pleasure of irritating repetitive noises, whining, scraped knees and the never ending battle of wills. She also was the recipient of hand holding, spontaneous hugs and a merry-go-round ride. She is a great mom.
















For Mother's Day I requested roasted marshmallows so we lit the firepit; Gina and I shared burned marshmallows and the pleasure of watching the girls giggle and talk girl talk with their best friend Samee.



She left yesterday to go home to Far Away. I miss her. We all miss her.

Famous French Toast

Emma came running in all excited today and said, "Gina is in the kitchen making her famous french toast! Do you want some, do you want some?"

Yesterday I was leaving to pick up my girls at school. Gina stayed behind to finish digging in the butterfly bushes. I glanced in my rear view mirror to take one last look at her. I was suddenly full of emotion. Full with the knowledge that the love of my life was standing in the middle of my front yard.

No More Sleeps!!!

Just a Matter of Time and Semantics

0yr to 20yrs ~ Exhumation














21yrs to 200yrs ~ Grave Robbing












201yrs to Ten Billion Freakin Whatever ~ Archeology


And then there is this... I am not sure where it falls into the grand scheme of things.

Copied from Carlita's Myspace blog without her permission but certain it really wouldnt be a problem anyway

Maybe this explains my cursed life

I swear on all that is holy this is an absolutely true story.

When we moved from Millbrae to Redwood City, the former owners of our new house left a few items behind.

One of them was a real human skeleton.

They told us that a year or so earlier they had been digging a well in the backyard. The project was abandoned when they hit human bones. They ecavated the poor guy. Someone or other told them the bones were that of an ancient Native American--the skeleton was found with its legs pulled up to its chest. I guess that was some kind of proof.

Anyway, they told us we could have it.

It was in a pile of pieces. We had a makeshift table in our playroom, and on it we worked at recontructing the skeleton. "We", as in just us kids. It was just a toy to us just like any other puzzle.

We would do the best we could; there were some pieces missing. I thought we did a pretty good job. I think the only part we ever got in the right place was the skull.

That skeleton laid in state there for years. When my mom decided it was time to move to Idaho, we didn't want to cart our friend around (looking back, it was probably against the law to cross state lines with the remains of a human anyway).

So we piled him up in a paper grocery bag and donated him to John F. Kennedy Junior High down the street.

No telling what vengeful family tragedies have befallen our family since then.

A Tree Grows in Boise

For The Future

by Wendell Berry

Planting trees early in spring,
we make a place for birds to sing
in time to come. How do we know?
They are singing here now.
There is no other guarantee
that singing will ever be.

From Collected Poems, 1957-1982. North Point Press, New York (1985). This poem first appeared in A Part (1980)

The tree people are coming today. I am ecstatic! I have been conversing with the robins who dine every morning on my worm abundant lawn. They harangue me for not keeping the bird bath clean and filled. I appease them with tales of tall trees and berries for their young. Everyday they sit on my fence and wait. They won't have to wait much longer. The trees are coming, the trees are coming!

4 sleeps...

and my baby will be here for the weekend! only a few days to soak in that li'l somethin' she's got. her first mother's day with my kids. perhaps the zoo or bocce on the lawn. whatever we do it will go too fast. then it's back to counting the days until...

Don't you think the heartburn medication AcipHex should instead be a hemorrhoid cream?

The Dangers of Cleaning the Garage

Yesterday while searching for the sandpaper to rough up the surface of my mower I accidentally cleaned my garage. It's an interesting endeavor. You run across things that make you wonder why you found them necessary to keep. Sometimes you realize that letting of the "thing" go will not erase the memory attached to it and it takes up less space.

Of course, you also run into things that tug at your heart strings and make you feel as if you have found a hidden treasure. Such treasures of mine often consist of photos. (big surprise) here are some from a galaxy far, far away...

James and I were Halloween Gods!

Obviously, I partied like it was 1999 and got caught! (pg with Hannah,'99)


Me with clothes on.

Hannah at 3 weeks.

Emma at 3 weeks.



I need to warn you that there will be more photos to follow.

Mowermorphosis

eb has always been an interesting character. I am especially taken with her art. She even paints cars although I can't seem to find a link to share them with you right now.

Anyway, for a long time I have been wanting to try some sort of art project. I was readying my yard tools for spring a few weeks ago and *BAM* it hit me! I am going to commit art on my lawn mower. What better place to put a piece of unexpected joy but on the machine many of us spend more time with in the summer than we do our partners? My electric Black and Decker screams suburbia with it's muddy green comformity. No more, I say!




I challenge each and everyone of you to paint your mower this summer. I will post a picture of mine when I'm done. I would love to see yours. If you don't have a mower, paint some other garden tool that you use throughout the summer. Go on! You KNOW you wanna do it!



Oh and thanks eb for being my inspiration!

Environmental Dissonance

Diamonds are a girl's best friend

I am taking a business class this term. I will be responsible for creating my own business plan. I have decided to run a Green Cemetery. I know you all are thinking that it sounds uncharacteristically liberal of me. I think my liberal lover is rubbing off. But I digress. While perusing the internet looking for information on the business practices of GC's, I ran across LifeGem.

LifeGem is a company which takes your loved one's ashes, human or otherwise and squeezes them so hard they create a diamond. Then you have a beautiful and wearable memorial for you to remember and honor the deceased.

You can turn your loved one into a blue, green, red, yellow or clear diamond. Princess cut, Round or Raient. Almost any size is available. I suppose it depends on how much you *really* loved them. For a mere $24,999 you can have a 1.5 carat created of your funny uncle Vinny who always bought you beer and let you watch porn at his house (laser inscription: add $75).

You can also make diamonds out of a lock of hair. This option can allow you to wear yourself around your own neck! If you were a diamond, which obviously you can be, what cut and color would you be?

Anyhow, my green cemetery will be the topic of many blog posts I am sure. Right now I need to find a name for it. I am taking suggestions so please feel free to post your ideas. And for fun, include your preference of diamond.

Back to the books...